My Partner Has Depression: What To Do?
People with depression experience deep sadness and apathy. The support of loved ones is therefore essential in order to escape this condition. In this context, it is important to know what you can do or what not to say in order to be able to give the person concerned the right help.
Often we want to help others but don’t know exactly how or we make mistakes. Good intentions don’t always help, so it’s important to do your research first. Because in some cases, if you don’t do the right thing, you get exactly the opposite. If your partner suffers from depression, we have several recommendations for you today that will help you do the right thing to actually support him or her.
depressions
We are talking about a mental disorder that manifests itself through sadness, apathy, brooding and listlessness. Affected people often lose interest in all activities and therefore need help and support, but also a lot of patience and understanding from their family and friends.
Depression can be temporary, but it can also become chronic. It can also be a mildly depressed phase or a serious condition. The following symptoms occur:
- Sadness and the feeling of emptiness
- Desire to cry
- Loss of interest in most things
- Fatigue and lack of energy
- Loss of appetite or just the opposite
- Anxiety and nervousness
- Irritability, anger, etc.
In this case, specialist support is very important in order to avoid complications. Serious depression may require pharmacological treatment.
Help from family and loved ones is definitely essential, even if it is mild depression. However, when their partner is depressed, many do not know how to deal with it, how to act, or what to or cannot talk about.
In this case, caution and sufficient information are very important in order to be able to help the person concerned as best as possible.
My partner has depression: what to say and what is better not to?
You have probably already said or wanted to say sentences like the following to your partner with good intentions:
- “With willpower you can do it.”
- “You have to do something and give the best of yourself.”
- “Get out of the house more so that you can clear your head.”
- «Thanks to everything you have. You have no reason to feel that way. “
However, these are the phrases you should never say to someone with depression. They simplify and trivialize the situation, which is usually very complicated and difficult. It is asking the person concerned to make an effort that they cannot make or that they consider something unimportant that causes them great suffering every day.
People with depression torment and blame themselves for all the things they cannot do. In addition, they usually cannot understand why they feel this way. So there is no need to remind them.
However, what you can say to your depressed partner are positive and constructive sentences like:
- “What can I do for you?”
- “I’m with you.”
- “You’re not alone.”
- “It’s not your fault.”
- «It will pass again. I am on your side.”
- “I love you.”
Your support is unconditional in this way, without involuntary reproaches about the situation and without feelings of guilt.
What to do if my partner has depression
There is a lot you can do for your partner to support him or her in this difficult situation. Then you will find various recommendations that can help you:
understanding
Understand that this is not an emotional state to choose from. The causes may also not be known to the person concerned. It is not your fault.
patience
Depression can be very long-term. You therefore need a lot of strength and must not neglect yourself. Practice patience and understanding and offer your help and love again and again as long as the recovery process lasts.
No compulsion
As mentioned earlier, most of the time the depressed person feels guilty for not being able to change things. With that in mind, you shouldn’t force her to go out or start new activities, as this could be counterproductive.
Observe thoughts of suicide
Even if this only happens in extreme cases, you need to be vigilant: Some people with depression have thoughts of suicide. Therefore, it is very important to watch out for the following signs:
- Comments on suicide (“I don’t want to live”, “If I were dead, I would be better”, “I want to kill myself” …)
- Possible acquisition of funds that make suicide possible
- The person concerned makes a will, organizes their possessions, etc.
- She says goodbye to loved ones.
However, there may also be very different signs that are often far from obvious. These types of thoughts desperately need immediate professional assistance from an experienced professional.
Offer your help
As mentioned earlier, in this case, the affected person needs your unconditional help, without forcing them or making them feel that they are unable to cope with the situation or that it is just a trivial matter. In many cases there is no need to say anything. It is often enough just to be by the side of the depressed person. She needs to know that she is not alone.
On the other hand, it’s also important to make her understand the importance of treatment. You could recommend therapy to your partner to improve the situation. However, you have to keep in mind that the person concerned has to make the final decision themselves.
